Have given all out for the past few weeks. Efforts, patience, time and money $ . All out.
What remains is the empty and motionless fragment of mine.
The body aches. Right from the deepest part, the bone ache-ing.
And other parts are 'nah~nah~' to react to any orders.
Need a way out. I need.
But there are things to be considered. Things that I can't let go of.
Perhaps it'll be a better way to let it be.
The problem comes from me indeed. That I'm not let-it-be in nature.
Mom says: Think for yourself before you think for others.
4th Sis says: Spend more considerations for yourself before anything else.
Perhaps I should. And things get easy with that.
Love it when Giddens spelled : Living is about a whole-life battle.
I'm like a warrior who fights to live.
And I'm, also, like my mummy's girl who eats and sleeps on time and nothing else.
If I could, I wished papa is here for everything.
I wished I am strong. as strong as Popeye.
And sometimes,
I wished I could be a bit stupid, dumb, mindless, unthinking, blur and non-sensible.
Because, that should be enough reasons for not being self-initiated responsible :D
wee~